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Language And Influence — Word Power
NLP and the power of everyday language
Have you ever noticed how using the word ‘don't’ as in ‘don't do that,’ dramatically increases the chances your listener will do exactly the opposite of what you ask?
Or how the word but’ erases anything said directly before it and redirect the listener's attention to whatever follows?
Did you realize that using because’ in a request creates an unconscious desire to comply?
One word can shift the meaning of a sentence and have a profound and often unexpected influence on the way people respond to your message.
If you'd like a quick experience of this, repeat the following statements to yourself.

“I want to reach my goal but I have a problem.”

“I want to reach my goal and I have a problem.”

“I want to reach my goal even though I have a problem.”

Which words seemed to diminish the importance of the problem?
Some words shout their importance, and we use them with care. Others are so familiar and comfortable we toss them into any conversation, without much thought.

Yet these words have a hidden power to increase your influence, easily moving people towards mutually satisfying results. But used unwisely, they can create road blocks and needless detours.
Take ‘but’ for exampleHow many times have you been on the receiving end of but?
“I agree with you but” or ...
“I understand but” and everyone's favorite ...
“I'd like to help you, but”
‘But’ and it's first cousin ‘however’ act like unexpected traffic lights popping up to reverse the flow of meaning in the speaker's words and erase everything said before them.
Test this for yourself by noticing where your attention goes as you say the following sentences.

“I know she means well, but her voice really irritates me.”

“Her voice really irritates me but I know she means well.”

“I want to increase my language skills but I am so busy with work.”

“I am so busy with work but I want to increase my language skills.”

Notice the difference?
Some people replace ‘but’ and ‘however’ with the word ‘and or ‘even though as you saw earlier.

And is a great choice because it is neutral or free from implied judgment, inclusive, and implies choice.
Are you ready to move on? And as we do, please don't feel the need to check the time because I'm not suggesting you should look at your watch now.
In fact, I would prefer it if you don't look at your watch now. And if you're not wearing a watch I don't want to suggest you look for the time icon on your computer screen. Please.
WordPower continues here:       Also see:
 Taming Your Not(s)               Because!
For more on WordPower visit our newsletter site: 

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